I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
eat the baked goods on the counter at your own risk... i made them while i was angry and drunk so they most likely have pubes in them
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
Randomize
