Im in the beachers at wrigley listening to four lesbians debate the pros and cons of 2girls1cup. Success.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
The best part about being single is knowing how much everyone secretly creeps behind their gf/bfs back. You wouldn't believe..Have a great date night!
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
My house is about to be spotless and the only person visiting is the plumber and not the porno kind.
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
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