He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
wait so...it's like an actual thing to masturbate using the detachable shower head? WTF I thought I was being creative!
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
I just had sex on a roof
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
Randomize
