Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Let's get the cat blown out
Soooo you know how I said I was trying to be a rational adult? Well that led to me fucking a rational adult today.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
