sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just woke up at my desk with "To Whommmmmmmmm" typed on a letter. I have no memory of waking up, getting dressed or driving in.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
Ps I don't think it counts as being open minded if you didn't know he was missing a leg until you had already started making out.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
We didn't want to make a pit stop so I just helped my husband pee in a bottle. No one told me this was part of love.
Drive by water balloon fight on $500,000 boats ended when someone threw a dildo
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
SHE'S PREGNANT AS SHIT, AND I JUSR PEELED A CLEMENTINE TO CHASE SHOTS WITH!! COULD LIFE GET ANY BETTER!?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
