look no pants
The guy asked if i had a problem w/set schedules
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
Let me clarify that those tears were for losing my fuck buddy and his penis, not to the fact that he decided he wanted an actual relationship with feelings.
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
I’ve jerked off three times and taken five shits already today. Being hung over in your 40’s is a fucking roller coaster.
Randomize