your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Who are you to come into MY house and tell me when I can or cannot take my pants off?
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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