at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
That's right. I just LL Cool J'ed you up in this bitch. Zero fucks.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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