im orety awesome arent i? relly i know i am
I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
so I was like, you know platform 9 3/4? I know something else with those measurements. best. pick up line. ever.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Whos eating a bunch of acid and watching fireworks tomorrow? This guy. Thats who.
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
You really could become the cat lady we've always dreamed of.
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
They're letting me in by good graces, I can't show up with a fist full of dildos
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