I feel like abortions should bother me more
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
