my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Me and my dog bond so much when im high.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Randomize
