the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
You may see me on espn tomorrow drunk, half naked, and selling articles of clothing to rich cougars like i did last year, but i will NOT be drinking shitty beer
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I just pulled a handful of rice out of my pocket.
I knew it was going to be a good night when i heard another girl call his dick "Thor's Hammer"
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Don't worry I sent a creepy stalker message to a guy I slept with 6 years ago, Sunday Funday rock bottom
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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