I just got a rly sharp new razor and was shaving down there...
and?
RIP clitoris
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
For the first time ever I'll be using my lunch break to pass out cold on my desk. We've gotta stop having these late night drinking things on Sundays
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
I had to steal sneakers from my man of the night. I dipped. But then realized I left my purse in his house. So I had to stash the shoes in some bushes and wait for him on the stoop. Then after he watches me leave, I run back and get the shoes cuz I didn't wanna be taking my hour long journey home through London at 3 pm in my six inch wedges and club dress
You forgot the part where I played Slip and Slide with my own puke and fucked up my knee.
you can't let guys come on your chest and then hog my blanket
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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