please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
Me and the cabbie are stopping on the way at a sit down restaurant to eat. My life is so sad.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
