Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
It was so delicious I was introducing it to people. Guy from my psych class was like "This is my girlfriend, Erica," and I was like, "This is my milkshake, Oreo."
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
do nipples grow back?
Randomize
