wrigley field is MILF paradise
Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
i can totally tell he's high. he's having a conversation with my dog.
You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
drunk doesn't even begin to explain it. dude called him and said to bring you back because he'd already called dibs.
They were done having sex when I went to the room. They had that look on their faces.
Disappointment?
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Im blaming it on six shots of Jack, loneliness and a chemical imbalance. That's the best I can think of...
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
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