Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I want a musical about memes.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
Randomize
