They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
I think the worst part about being a real adult is 1)having a high stress job that makes me want to get stoned 2)paying for reefer using my own money 3)realizing my boyfriends children probably have more weed connections than I do anymore
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
I got his number because he was "impressed with how much I could handle"...I was chasing shots with Olive Garden breadsticks...
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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