One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
He played the same pre-sex songs as his brother...
Went home last night with a guy in a tutu, didn't know he was wearing a tutu until he threw it at me in the bedroom. God I love Halloween.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
