Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
I worked so hard to shave everything last night. EVERYTHING. He WILL be answering my phone calls. Otherwise he's passing up awesome random birthday sex.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
