A hot woman with candy. This is what heaven is filled with
just tell him i said nine months
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
If they were bad they leave that night, if they were good they get a gold star, and if they were great they get invited back. Simple.
Trying to Jedi mind trick myself into not throwing up. This is not the esophagus you are looking for.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
You are talking to me during sexting hours. Be careful, innuendos are taken seriously
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
Sooo...you're driving 6 hours for free booze?
Don't judge me.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
fuck st louis. fuck their hockey. fuck their basball. fuck their football if they still got it. fuck their tiddlywinks teamm. fuck their ribs. fuck their entire city. what im trying to say is i dont like st louis
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
Randomize
