the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
So I was watching the View and they were saying oral sex is the new goodnight kiss
So when are we having a sleepover?
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
The waitress asked if you wanted white or brown, and you said "Isn't it all the same color when it's toasted?". She stared at you for about 20 seconds before she decided that you weren't fucking with her.
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
