I'm going to community service drunk, and I'm still going to be the most normal person there.
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Just orgasmed in canada. I should get a sticker or something that says I orgasmed in a different country.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
Also, I saved your name as Everclear last night. No idea why I did that.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Your poor dick will look at you and scowl for all the abuse he's going to take this week.
How dare you not respond to me after opening up a picture of my bare breasts
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I can't have the last guy who touched my vagina be my coworker.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
Randomize
