Writing my paper on freud at bar
??
Going up to girls and asking if they were anal explosive or anal retentive as children
Smooth
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
All I can remember is posting my chicken burger in the post box. Postman is in for a treat.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
I can't turn off my feet"
Woke up with a 6lb bucket of Redvines with a note that said "I'm sorry" care to explain?
2014 decided to stick it to me one last time. Right up the ass.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
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