I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
I was preparing to do my walk of shame shirtless, but then I found my sweater, wallet and keys neatly piled under a tree in the park.
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
i am one fart away from being 2 for 2 on this whole shitting my pants thing.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I have the rest of my life to settle down this is totally time for friends and pizza
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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