The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
We enjoyed our moment of partial gayness together
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
And you will die and be carried in a backpack before I allow you not to comply in this tomfoolery.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
