You had a beer at 10:30 this morning?
Ya, I didn't have any Tylenol.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
