So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
Hey nothing wrong with those! I can't believe the guys who let me see where they live on first dates. Even more surprising, I don't stalk them after they've done me wrong.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
Randomize
