she's sitting on the other side of the room at this party. with her smirnoff tucked in that little opening between her cleavage and shirt. drinking from a straw. snapping her fingers off beat.
it's love
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
putting weed in the twinkies box was possibly the best idea you've ever had
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
He said I went to go sit outside and is promised I wouldn't leave he brings me a chair and I'm gone. He found me stumbling a half mile away in my socks
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
idk but im stoned n hiding in the bathroom from my kids with a really big bowl of really little candy bars
Randomize
