Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
Let's create a 16 and pregnant drinking game
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
He fucked a visibly pregnant girl. It doesn't get weirder than that.
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
