All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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