For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
If you get me so fucked up I can't use the microwave , I'm going to be so mad at you
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
My clit is not a Gobstopper. Cut it out.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
Randomize
