no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
I woke up with hair in my teeth and half his beard was missing.
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
I'm like bob the builder except I'm fixing boners.
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
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