I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
How did I roll 7 times this month and survive?\nI must be some sort of ecstasy goddess
I just got my beard fondled by a drunk chick outside the venue. I feel slightly violated. And I think her boyfriend wanted to fight me.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Did I let your boyfriend smear a banana into my face last night? Because I have pictures that are telling me I did....
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
I got horny for like a second but the eggplant snapped me out of it
I feel like I have the I just lost my virginity face and everyone at the grocery store knows it.
Randomize
