worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The only way to make beer can wizard staffs any better is to sew your own wizards robe and hat to go along with it. welcome to tuesday nights at my new apartment
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
My lunch = taste testing salsas for A&P. They gave me a free 64oz grape juice as a thank you. So, now we have something to drink in the house. So while you are spending all the money on breakfast rolls and pizza for lunch, I'm cigaretteless and whoring myself for tablespoons of salsa and free juice.
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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