You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
he just asked me to email him a handle of captain morgans...how sober do you think he is?
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
No we didn't talk. I was high and doing naked yoga in the living room when she walked in so it was just awkward. I didn't even know my dad had a girlfriend.
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
Randomize
