normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
I'm stoned and have been watching so many cartoons that I changed the channel and real people were on, and it scared me
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
I wonder how horrible I look to customers. There's cuts all over my face and I can't talk.
What are the cuts from? Head-butting the bathroom light fixture?
Honestly that's best case scenario.
Randomize
