I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Oh, and no balcony sex...trust me.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
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