u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Hahahahaha. That's what your stoned ass gets for eating half a bag of processed cheese at 2am.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
We're just starting to open presents and I already need a shot. This is gonna be a long Christmas day.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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