would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
It's the foolproof way to identify who didn't get laid last night
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Well anyways I still cant believe I don't remember such a monumental day in history as you showing me your boobs... Jesus
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
Randomize
