Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
Just did a shot to pluto being a planet again. I love science.
ah. the first shower back home is like a baptism from the sins of the past year
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
I petted my head, told my hair it felt beautiful and needed to be let free. Then pulled out my pony tail. Cheers to weed. I lose.
Is it really bad that my last patient offered to fuck my brains out if I gave her IV morphine...and I gave her my phone number and told her when my shift is over?
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
ROB LOWE. SO BEAUTIFUL. SO DOUCHEY. SO HARD TO SPELL HIS NAME WHEN DRUNK.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Randomize
