garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
two words...techno handjob
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
Hey when you get home, can you do me a solid and throw one of your pregnancy tests on my bed?
EPT or First Response?
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
