don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
You convinced us both to take shots of jack Daniels through our eyes.
Did you rob me and blame it on the strippers?
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
Randomize
