I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
i learned a valuable lesson last night. sometimes nice girls finish first. twice.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Have you ever looked at someone and thought…oh honey, you're too pretty for an ankle monitor
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
We can have bacon on the roof while tanning
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