Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
I'm still trying to decide if it's a complement when he said "I'd like to subscribe to your daddy issues".
They have a guy from new zealand living under their stairs.. they don't charge him rent. He just buys food and booze and bartends their house parties.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
40s are totally the cure
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
