He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I did the crab walk everywhere because I was drunk enough that it was easier than standing up.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
