Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Fantastic night. drank beer from a wine bottle, danced on a van, chased a llama, and fell from a fence
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Wait wait wait. I remember riding in her car to the next bar. On your lap. With my head on the dashboard. That probably should have been my cut off point.
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
it's like I can see my whorish nature reflected back at me in his wedding ring.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
The condoms have been found. I repeat: THE CONDOMS HAVE BEEN FOUND. he isn't a collector!!!
I'm glad that we laid to rest the suspicion that he was keeping them in a scrapbook. yayy
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
so does the amount of bruises on my arms and legs mean we had fun last night?
A Valium induced mom decided to walk into my bedroom this morning without knocking. Guess what I was doing? FML
Randomize
