Sry I called you an 8
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
you vomited through the snorkel and onto the back of your head. it was truly amazing
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Did i tell you that he's legal and i got his number? Because he's legal and i got his number. THIS BITCH AIN'T GOING TO JAIL YET
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
If he cant deal with my insomnia and sex drive I really feel sorry for his child and ex fiance. Adulthood breakups are depressing.
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
WHO GIVES HANDJOBS AT 8 IN THE FUCKING MORNING
Randomize
