they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Pants off. Spirits lifted.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
He asked me to fly out to Seattle to participate in a week of marathon sex so I'm at the airport now. I'll call you when I get back.
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
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