I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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